"My response to the “I am not a feminist” internet phenomenon….
First of all, it’s clear you don’t know what feminism is. But I’m not going to explain it to you. You can google it. To quote an old friend, “I’m not the feminist babysitter.”
But here is what I think you should know.
You’re insulting every woman who was forcibly restrained in a jail cell with a feeding tube down her throat for your right to vote, less than 100 years ago.
You’re degrading every woman who has accessed a rape crisis center, which wouldn’t exist without the feminist movement.
You’re undermining every woman who fought to make marital rape a crime (it was legal until 1993).
You’re spitting on the legacy of every woman who fought for women to be allowed to own property (1848). For the abolition of slavery and the rise of the labor union. For the right to divorce. For women to be allowed to have access to birth control (Comstock laws). For middle and upper class women to be allowed to work outside the home (poor women have always worked outside the home). To make domestic violence a crime in the US (It is very much legal in many parts of the world). To make workplace sexual harassment a crime.
In short, you know not what you speak of. You reap the rewards of these women’s sacrifices every day of your life. When you grin with your cutsey sign about how you’re not a feminist, you ignorantly spit on the sacred struggle of the past 200 years. You bite the hand that has fed you freedom, safety, and a voice.
In short, kiss my ass, you ignorant little jerks.”
Rose met the most fantastic man in the universe, who actually thought she was the most fantastic woman in the universe and that doesn’t really happen often.
I am no expert on love,
But I have a few suggestions to keeping your love alive.
1- Don’t fall asleep angry. But if you do, wake up in the middle of the night and hold her as close as you can.
2- Laugh during sex, especially if you bump heads. If you aren’t laughing, you’re with the wrong person.
3- If you don’t feel comfortable dancing naked with your partner and showing them your four chins when you laugh, you’re doing it wrong.
4- Romance isn’t for everyone, but a post-it note in their lunchbox telling them they’re the best will never go amiss.
5- Don’t cling to them at parties. Dance with friends and spend time with acquaintances, but wink at each other across the room.
6- Keep everything 50/50, or you will fall out of balance.
7- Stop comparing your relationship to others- you are you, don’t try to be someone else.
8- Be kind. Give them space when they need it, but be their home when they come back.
9- Be proud to love them.
10- Support them through whatever they do in life, even if it’s a stupid decision. People need to make their own mistakes, but be there if it falls apart, and never say ‘I told you so’.
And most of all, love with your whole heart, or don’t love at all.